there is no better distraction than the following: people. watching your boss/mother-in-law being eaten by a zombie is sort of fun, albeit frightening. because once the zombies are done with them, you're next. i suggest you run as fast as you can.
on a darker note, watching your best friend/true love being eaten by a zombie is quite upsetting and rather horrific, and it's much harder to run when that is the case.
all the same: bodies, dead or alive (sometimes even other zombies work) are wondeful distractions. cats aren't as good as humans, but normally they suffice. dogs are better than cats but less effective than your grandpa. family members work the best, with hated enemies coming in second. goldfish don't work, no matter how dear they are to you. the zombies'll just shove it in their mouth and continue the chase. you just wasted a perfectly good goldfish.
another pretty good distraction is to give them your arm, but only the really desperate people (or the people whose arm was just ripped off) do that.
Saturday, July 4, 2009
weapons
most people don't know what weapons to use when they're attacked by zombies. just a tip: tree branches don't work. don't even bother.
CAMERON'S DICTIONARY OF WEAPONS AND THEIR EFFECT ON ZOMBIES:
oars: oars are good for temporarily fending off the zombies (particularly if you're on a boat, where you can send them soaring into the water), but in the long run, it's about as useful as a tree branch.
knives: knives, to tell you the truth, really aren't much help when it comes to battling zombies. i mean, it's always handy to have a knife in your back pocket (just be careful not to stab yourself when you fall onto your arse) so you can manufacture armour and whatnot. also good for chopping up your best friend and using them as bait, and works wonders for threatening the living. on the dead, however, it's sort of useless.
handguns: guns aren't particularly useful when in combat with walking, grunting, corpses. putting a hole through their head doesn't do much more then make them stumble a bit from the power of the blast. sorry, mate, guns don't work.
fire: fire is a useful tool when fighting zombies. i don't know if you've noticed, but fire burns things until they're reduced to ash. it works with zombies. if you light a zombie on fire, it's as good as dead (most of the time), though it is really intimidating to be chased by a decomposing body with half of his head on fire *shudder*
pointy sticks: what did i say about tree branches?! honestly, a pointy tree branch isn't much better than a not-pointy tree branch.
bombs: bombs, like fire, can be quite useful when attempting to destroy zombies. bombs create an explosion, which normally erupts in a flame-like manner, incinerating everyone within a distance. bombs are good, if you don't mind running as fast as you can, ducking and throwing yourself at the ground, and being rained upon by itsy-bitsy pieces of zombie.
that's all i've got on weapons, but remember: NO BRANCHES
CAMERON'S DICTIONARY OF WEAPONS AND THEIR EFFECT ON ZOMBIES:
oars: oars are good for temporarily fending off the zombies (particularly if you're on a boat, where you can send them soaring into the water), but in the long run, it's about as useful as a tree branch.
knives: knives, to tell you the truth, really aren't much help when it comes to battling zombies. i mean, it's always handy to have a knife in your back pocket (just be careful not to stab yourself when you fall onto your arse) so you can manufacture armour and whatnot. also good for chopping up your best friend and using them as bait, and works wonders for threatening the living. on the dead, however, it's sort of useless.
handguns: guns aren't particularly useful when in combat with walking, grunting, corpses. putting a hole through their head doesn't do much more then make them stumble a bit from the power of the blast. sorry, mate, guns don't work.
fire: fire is a useful tool when fighting zombies. i don't know if you've noticed, but fire burns things until they're reduced to ash. it works with zombies. if you light a zombie on fire, it's as good as dead (most of the time), though it is really intimidating to be chased by a decomposing body with half of his head on fire *shudder*
pointy sticks: what did i say about tree branches?! honestly, a pointy tree branch isn't much better than a not-pointy tree branch.
bombs: bombs, like fire, can be quite useful when attempting to destroy zombies. bombs create an explosion, which normally erupts in a flame-like manner, incinerating everyone within a distance. bombs are good, if you don't mind running as fast as you can, ducking and throwing yourself at the ground, and being rained upon by itsy-bitsy pieces of zombie.
that's all i've got on weapons, but remember: NO BRANCHES
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